There once was a boy who had mastered the art of pumpkin carving. He had carved pumpkins every year with his mother ever since he could remember, gaining much experience along the way. This Fall, the boy had decided to enter one of his creations into the annual pumpkin carving contest his town put on. The winner of this contest would receive a ride along lawn mower. The boy and his mother lived on a plot of land with a lot of acres and one of his chores was cutting the grass when it grew too tall. A lawn mower he could ride would be perfect for him!
After crafting a beautiful carving depicting a castle being attacked by a dragon, the boy sat back to admire his work. After staring at the castle for a few minutes he began to daydream about winning the contest.
The boy thought:
When I win, the townspeople will be cheer but be so jealous at the same time! That mean old Jacob Jr. will be so surprised he did not win this year. I will take home my prize to momma and never complain about mowing the grass again. Until the engine breaks, then I will have to take it to the mechanic down the street. Since he does not get a lot of lawn mowers in his shop he will not know how to fix it and I will have to break it apart and trade the parts in. I will trade the parts in at the scrap yard for a bike so I won't have to walk to school everyday. The bike will make me look so cool! After a couple years I will trade in my bike for a motor scooter, paying the rest with allowance money. The scooter will surely get me a girlfriend in high school and she will want to marry me. When I reject her and tell her I want to live with my momma the rest of my life she will get angry with me. After storming off she will go to my momma's house and bang on the door yelling for her to come out and speak with her. I do not like it when my momma is upset by anyone because she goes in her room for days and does not come out. I don't want my high school girlfriend making my momma cry and stay in her room!
After angering himself over this thought, the boy picked up his pumpkin and threw it to the ground. The creation that was sure to win at the contest was now a pile of yuck. The boy ran inside and hugged his momma, whom he would make sure never got upset by his high school girlfriend.
Author's Note: I based my story off of the Indian fairy tale titled "
The Broken Pot" in the Indian Fairy Tale Unit by Joseph Jacobs. In this fairy tale, there is a Brahman who saved up a pot of rice and he began to think about what to do with it. He eventually traded the rice up to earning a house with wings. Then his daydreaming gets shifted towards obtaining a wife and then a child and how he would then tell the child to come to him one day and he would get mad at the wife because the child would be too close to danger so he ends up breaking the pot of rice when kicking his wife in his daydreams. I thought this was such a crazy fairy tale I had to re-create it with a modern twist. I used a little boy because I thought the Brahman resembled a little boy in his thinking and ill temper. I tried not to drift towards getting money as a trading up source to keep with the theme from the fairy tale. Ultimately, I needed something to have the boy destroy that he thought was the starting point of his final trade that led to his anger. After writing this story I realized both the fairy tale and my story reminded me of a cable commercial (I forget for which service) that creates this same kind of ridiculous thinking and that is where the title comes from. I thought it was pretty funny how some people can lead to conclusions that are so far from where they begin.